Your Mars Sign, As Explained by Green Day

Ah, Mars the warrior, the gladiator, the agressor. So named for the Roman god of all those things, Mars is this big beautiful red ball of gas up in the sky, but how exactly does it affect our daily lives? Simply put, Mars tells us all about how we fuck and how we fight.

When you were born Mars was in one of the 12 constellations of the zodiac. Your style of arguing and love making is going to differ depending on which of those constellations it was chillen at in when your mom squeezed you out.

If you were like me, then you had preteen angst, teen angst, and even latent teenage angst. You know which band was the sound track to every single stage of my angst? Green Day. And you can say what you want about their music now, but when they released the pop punk perfection that is the album Dookie in February of 1992, the world was forever changed. It was a no brainer for me as to which artist to choose to sing about our human capacity to yell and bump nasties, Green Day has always been that band for me.

Image from idiots_greenday

Aries: Stay The Night

Aries is ruled by Mars so it feels at home in this placement, albeit it a bit overwheled as well. This Mars placement is all about quick decisions, not beating around the bush, and being courageous af. If this is your placement than you’re likely to be someone that’s no stranger to a fight or a one night stand. This passionate fire energy ruling your agressive side makes you someone with enough vitality to play sports all day long and fuck til the sun comes up. Want to entice a Aries Mars individual? Take them on a spontaneous adventure, dare them to do something stupid, or challenge them to some sort of competition. They’ll be putty in your hands.

The song Stay the Night is about a passionate one night stand. It has lovely firey lyrics that encapsulate the Aries ideal of fierce love. Here are some notable Aries inspiring lyrics:

Well I ain’t got much time so I’ll get to the point   here we see how Aries Mars doesn’t beat around the bush

I’ve got an inpulse so impulsive that it burns   I mean, come one…

Say you’ll stay the night because we’re running out of time   that high Aries sex drive and the need to satiate it right now is shown here

Taurus: Waiting

You know what they say, if you mess with the bull you’ll get the horns. This is an intriguing Mars placement because Taurus is ruled by the planet Venus, so it’s naturally inclined to lean more towards ooey gooey love than abrassive passion. Taurus is classically stubborn as all hell though, so that shines through in this placement. Taurus knows how to get shit done, they know how to do it well, and they aren’t going to let you change their mind. If you can get past their inability to be spontaneous, they are exttemely fulfilling lovers because there’s nothing a Taurus loves more than pleasure. And as stubborn as they are, they are incredibly patient and caring.

The song Waiting is one of those songs that says a bunch of words but is actually about nothing. Even still, the few words Billy Joe does sing are very Taurean. Here are some notable lyrics:

I’ve been waiting a long time for this moment to come   Taurean patience in full force here

Wake up   ya know, becuase Taurus loves a good snooze

So close enough to taste it   because they can wait forever for a goal to come to fruition and they are the most likely sign to make a food anaology about it

Good luck you’re gonna need it   because if you don’t follow a Taurus’ advice you’ll probably regret it
Gemini: Walking Contradiction

This is the Mars sign of someone who thinks foreplay is a heated debate. They want to argue with you because it is fun for them. They won’t even necessarily prescribe to the side they argue on, the act of arguing is the most important part for them, not actually sharing their opinions. They have lots of ideas abouncing around in their head and they wan to share them with you, so if you’re looking to court someone with Mars in Gemini you better be well read. This is a placement that doesn’t lend itself to monogamy because Gemini wants to know everyone and experience everything. But they are good with their hands so don’t be afraid to ask for a massage and see where it goes.

Walking Contradiction has Gemini written all over it. I’m not going to explain it more than that because the first verse is so dense with Gemini Mars lyrics that I’m just gonna dump it all on you:

Do as I say, not as I do because the shit’s so deep you can’t run away. I beg to differ on the contrary I agree with every word that you say. Talk is cheap and lies are expensive my wallets fat and so is my head. Hit and run and then I’ll hit you again, a smart ass but I’m playing dumb.
Cancer: Worry Rock

This highly expressive sign isn’t exactly the most at home chillen with the red planet. This is a very moody placement so if you know somone with it make sure that you are hugging them often. They quite literally need hugs to survive. Safety turns them on, so does being at home. Much like a crab with it’s shell, a Cancer Mars wants to be at home all of the time. If a Cancer Mars person loves you then they will want to literally live inside of you. If two objects could physically occupy the same space, that’s what people with this placement would do. They will most likely be the type of people who cry when they’re mad.

Worry Rock is such a sweet song and yet it is about arguing and fighting. It makes my heart feel warm and cozy, and that’s really all a Cancer Mars is looking for. Here are some of the most Cancerian lyrics:

Another sentimental argument and bitter love   only a Cancer would describe an argument as sentimental

Promise me no dead end streets and I’ll guarantee we’ll have the road   this line is about just wanting to see a less than ideal future and not getting bogged down by a less than perfect present.
Leo: She’s a Rebel

Leo’s need to be in the spotlight is highlighted in this placement as a need for power and position. This is a charming af Mars sign, so they’ll probablly be your favorite boss ever. Pleasure and playtime are necessary for these guys. And don’t you dare fucking skimp on any of the bells and whistles involved in the courting process. Leo is ruled by the heart so this is going to be a passionate person on the office floor and the bedroom floor.

This is a major pump up song, it’s all about how badass this chick is. Every Leo Mars listened to this on their walkmans in middle school and pretended it was about them. Now in 2018 it finally is. Here are some of the lyrics that are especially applicable:

She’s a rebel, she’s a saint, she’s the salt of the Earth and she’s dangerous   this line highlights Leo Mars’ ability ot be anything and everything

From Chicago to Toronto she’s the one that they call oh Whatshername   because only a Leo Mars’ infamy can span that far

She brings this liberation that I just can’t define   that’s because Leo Mars is a mother fuckin leader
Virgo: Church on Sunday 

The little things are the most important for this Mars placement. If this was a Good Charlotte post and not Green Day, I’d have chosen the song Little Things, obvi. Seriously, the magic is in the details for a Virgo Mars. They are more likely than not huge health nuts. Vegan, gluten free, all veggie smoothies, yoga, meditation, cardio for the heart because their grandpa’s friend died of a heart attack, a Virgo Mars knows how to prevent that. It’s total health as well, this palcement lends itself to God/desses of health and wellness. 10/10 they will tell you how to live your life but they will be right. They will also make love to you like they’ve got a deadline, and a Virgo always makes a dealine.

While this song doesn’t give us the hollistic side of a Virgo Mars, it does showcase the side of this sign that believes in healing and truth. Also, anything to do with ministry fits into the Virgo archetype and I really love this song, so here are some Virgo lyrics:

Today is the first day of the rest of our lives   here we see the Virgo belief that every day is a new day to concur

If I promise go to church on Sunday will you go with me on Friday night?   a Virgo knows that to repent and improve is the only way to succeed in an endeavor

If you live with me I’ll die for you and this compromise   because a Virgo lives to serve

I hereby solemnly swear to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth is what I’ll ever hear from you   this shows us the Virgo ideal of honesty above all else

Libra: Peacemaker 

Libra is in detriment here in Mars, that’s because Libra is the sign of peace and harmony. This manifests as someone who is a warrior for good, a warrior for justice and all things nice. They probably feel very strongly about animal abuse, climate change, or human rights and will probably get so worked up about it that they cry while in line at the grocery store. They are hopelessly romantic, so to please them in bed all you need is some Jasmine oil, 2 dozen red roses, and about 100 lit candles.

This song gives us the duality and indecision of Libra while also tying in the theme of being a warrior for good. Here are some Libra af lyrics:

As God as my witness the infidels are gonna pay   this lyric showcases the holier than thou need for justice that can plague this placement

A spasm of love and hate   here we see the very Libra essence of duality

I feed off the weakness with all my love   Libra Mars may be a fighter but they do so out of love

Scorpio: Basket Case

Mars actually likes hanging out here in Scoprio, which is more than I can say for the majorty of the population (mysele not included, Scorpios are my fucking favorite humans). This makes for a super passionate and yet calm person, because Scorpio hates being an emotional mess in front of anyone. Mars brings out Scorpios need to acomplish things of importance, so this is a placement of someone who gets shit done and charges double for their services. This person is a rare and complicated little angel human, so take time getting to know them inside and out. They love great sex and they love to date scumbags… Am I sure this isn’t my Mars placement?

Honestly, this song is maybe the most Scorpio song I know to be in existence. I don’t know how I’m going to narrow down the quotes. It touches on sex, mental instability, and moodniess. Here are my top picks:

I am one of those melodramatic fools neurotic to the bone   here we see Scorpio’s ability to get stuck up in their head

Sometimes I give myself the creeps, sometimes my mind plays tricks on me   Scorpio is the creepy archetype of the zodiac

I went to a shrink to analyze my dreams, she says it’s lack of sex that’s bringing me down   if there were anything that most effects the proper function of a Scorpio’s brain…

Sagittarius: Castaway

This is the sign of the explorer, so this placement makes for someone with all the energy! They love hiking, backpacking, drinking until dawn, making new friends, trying new things. Life truly is this good for a Sag Mars, they see things with rose tinted glasses. Their eternal optimism also lends itself to making some poor choices. If you dare someone with a Sag Mars to do something stupid they will 10/10 give it a try. They love super hard but they love freedom more than anything else, so don’t try to hold them too tightly or you’ll be eating the dust from their new motocycle that they just won in arm wrestling competition.

This song is all about stepping out on your own, not having a well defined path to follow but walking it any way, what could be more Sagittarius? It highlights both travel and freedom, so here are some lyric for ya:

I’m on a mission into destination unknown   does Sag love anything more than an unknown road ahead?

Castaway going at it alone, castaway now I’m on my own   because a Sag Mars needs the freedom to explore life without anyone else holding them back

Capricorn: Nice Guys Finish Last

Ah, here is where Capricorn finally gets the praise it deserves. Capricorn is said to exhaulted in this Mars placement, meaning that people with this placement are lucky af. Success is a guaranteed endeavor whenever a Cap Mars sets their sights on a goal. They live to work, there is no separation of work and life here. They want a pretty house, pretty clothes, and pretty furniture. They have leather bound books and tables of fine mohagony. And when it comes to sex, they will either hump all day long like they’re getting paid for it or they’ll forget about sex for like 6 months

I imagine this is what a Capricorn Mars listens to in order to pump themselves up for an important meeting with their boss who they plan to usurp within the year. It’s a classic, here are some lyrics:

Your sympathy will get you left behind   Capricorn knows that you have to look out for number 1 first and everyone else 2nd

You’re shaking lots of hands, you’re kissing up and bleeding all your trust, taking what you need   A Cap Mars will do whatever it takes to succeed

Nice guys finish last   I mean, YEAH

Aquarius: Minority

You can find an Aquarius Mars at every local poitical rally in the tristate area. They love progress and feeling a sense of community, so it’s a win win. Weird is their kind of wonderful, so they are here to support and uplift every underdog and under represented person. They also believe in a deep universal love. All love is love and they want to share it with everyone. These are the people who love a cuddle puddle, are always friends with their exs, and probably have at least experimented with polyamory.

This was just too fucking easy, of course it’s the song Minority. This has Aquarius written all over it, inside of it, and withing a 50 mile radius of it. I could quote the whole song tbh but I’ll give ya the first verse instead:

I want to be the minority. I don’t need your authority. Down with the moral majority cause I want to be the minority. Ok but seriously just listen to the whole song if you aren’t familiar with it and you have Aquarius anywhere in your chart, because this song hits the archetype on the head.

Pisces: Jesus of Suburbia and 21 Guns

This is the Mars placement of someone who wants to save and fix everyone. Your pain is also their pain, and they’ll take all of yours on willingly (maybe to avoid their own issues tbh). This is the placement of someone who wants to go to the deep depths of the ocean with you, they don’t like splashing around in the wave pool. They take on everyone elses pain and problems so often that they need to make sure to schedule in some alone time to recharge and prepare for the next broken bird they take under their wing.

Alright, you Pisces Mars folks get arguably my favorite Green Day song, Jesus of Suburbia. It’s been on my yearly playlist pretty much every year since forever, I even sang it like a lullaby to my cry niece once much to my mother’s dismay. Not only does it show us the Pisces vibes of deep emotionality and taking on other people’s problems, it also comes in many parts which highlights the patchwork soul of a Pisces. Ok I’ve rambled enough, here are some lyrics:

I’m the son of rage and love the Jesus of Suburbia   making himself a skin to the very guy who took on all our sins is very Piscean

Lost children with dirty faces, no one really seems to care   here we have tender Pisces making everyone’s problems their own personal problems

Everyone’s so full of shit born and raised by hypocrites, hearts recycled but never saved   this is the Pisces before it realizes that it needs time to recharge before it gets all bogged down by the dirt of the world

And I walked this line a million and one fucking times   because a Pisces Mars knows that their soul has done this all before and will do it all again

Image from toodumbtodie

It shoud be noted that these placements can affect someone’s life in very different ways depending on the other aspects in their chart. Astrology feels like a bottomless pit of information and this is still just barely scraping the surface.
With every one of these blog posts more and more or my brand keeps popping out to say wassup. I mean, there can be many correlations drawn between Billy Joel and Green Day if I’m being honest, but that’s a topic for another day.

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